From this week’s podcast, “Overcoming Depression During The Holidays” A Panel discussion with four of the Contributors from How to Crush it in Business without Crushing Your Spirit, How Entrepreneurs Can Overcome Depression and Find Success, with Jillian Coleman Wheeler:

I think that across the board, all times of the year, that the source of the greatest pain for people, for most of us is the gap between our expectations and the reality. And that’s really a problem at holidays because the holidays are so fetishized by movies and music and television. And, as a culture, we have this expectation of amazing gatherings where the love flows, and the food flows, and people are thrilled to be together. And, sometimes, that’s the case and sometimes it isn’t. So, I think it’s very important to just notice what your expectations may be, and then just make an agreement with yourself to let go of your expectations, and just let things unfold.

And for people who are people who are hosting holidays…there’s a huge burden that people put on themselves to be perfect. My husband even has a little bit of that too, to get the right presents (for each of the grandchildren). It’s a little race. He runs in his head. “What would Donovan most one?” “How will I find out?” And “How can I find it? So, for women, for anyone who’s hosting, it’s often, the meal has to be perfect. The timing has to be perfect. The decorations have to be perfect. And that’s a big financial burden, sometimes, for people who really aren’t our position to do that; entertaining is expensive.

…There are so many expectations that we all have of ourselves and the holiday. So, I think it’s very important to be conscious….One of the things that I always do for myself and that I encourage my clients to do is to use the law of attraction around the holidays. And in order to do that, I’ll just go to my journal and write down what I want to experience during the holidays or I’m thinking right now, just next week. In fact, I was writing today, “During the Thanksgiving period I feel loved and appreciated. I feel carefree and able to enjoy myself without feeling burdened. I feel like I look pretty, I feel that I’m able to connect (on an emotional level) with everybody special to me. “

And there may be some people at the holiday gathering with whom I don’t have that kind of a connection. So, then I may just write down, “I feel the whole day is filled with order and harmony.” Order and harmony are big words that I use a lot from really from unity because if there’s perfect order in a situation that everything will unfold in the highest way for everyone.

And peace and harmony are definitely important at holiday gatherings.

To listen to the entire podcast or read the transcript, go to